Turmoil
Past few days has been terrible... met with lotsa ice treatment from the one person i care for most now... i think she is really trying to avoid me, she doesnt reply me anymore or our conversation has been really snappy and short... I wonder why things turn out this way, maybe its my fault to begin with oso... i went too fast and hard... think i scareded her...
After a talk with freda and addie, i managed to get some advice from them, but it seemed that the situation has deterriorated so much that its beyond salvage... sigh... i just have to screw myself up at times... Last nite was bash, I saw her there when she dun like bashes... She din even bother to acknowledge my presence or talk to me... Even Char and the rest of the gang says she's been acting funny recently, giving funny signals to people that she is interested in them? I wonder what's going on.. ---> to tell me to back off? ask me to give up?? or just to spite me?? I really wish i know whats on her mind...
I came back early thou, even though i very much wanted to drink and get myself drunk... But i got ippt. Can't sleep the whole night, cos i was worried about her at the bash, thou i know freda is there with her. At the ippt, i was damn surprised to meet kwanhua there, actually more relieved than anything else, cos i was so worried to have to take alone. but luckily got him, made things easier for me oso cos i was feeling weak and inept and troubled by her. Everything turned out well also, even though i din train for it, but it wasnt without controvesy. I finished my 2.4 run in 9:43, and i got my gold and 400 bucks. Thanks to the guy who double checked my timing for me, cos i know my timing was those borderline cases. To him, double thanks, cos i got an additional 200 bucks to make use of for my textbooks. This was the only highlight point of my life these few days, but if u ask me, i would gladly exchange this for her acceptance...
Sigh... What to do now??
Another thing is I'm meeting Maria for dinner tonight, she is baking brownies for me.. hehehz.. so sweet of her..
After a talk with freda and addie, i managed to get some advice from them, but it seemed that the situation has deterriorated so much that its beyond salvage... sigh... i just have to screw myself up at times... Last nite was bash, I saw her there when she dun like bashes... She din even bother to acknowledge my presence or talk to me... Even Char and the rest of the gang says she's been acting funny recently, giving funny signals to people that she is interested in them? I wonder what's going on.. ---> to tell me to back off? ask me to give up?? or just to spite me?? I really wish i know whats on her mind...
I came back early thou, even though i very much wanted to drink and get myself drunk... But i got ippt. Can't sleep the whole night, cos i was worried about her at the bash, thou i know freda is there with her. At the ippt, i was damn surprised to meet kwanhua there, actually more relieved than anything else, cos i was so worried to have to take alone. but luckily got him, made things easier for me oso cos i was feeling weak and inept and troubled by her. Everything turned out well also, even though i din train for it, but it wasnt without controvesy. I finished my 2.4 run in 9:43, and i got my gold and 400 bucks. Thanks to the guy who double checked my timing for me, cos i know my timing was those borderline cases. To him, double thanks, cos i got an additional 200 bucks to make use of for my textbooks. This was the only highlight point of my life these few days, but if u ask me, i would gladly exchange this for her acceptance...
Sigh... What to do now??
Another thing is I'm meeting Maria for dinner tonight, she is baking brownies for me.. hehehz.. so sweet of her..
posted by EniGmAtiC NoStaLgiA at 1/21/2006 10:57:00 AM
1 Comments:
erm k the books and dunn think so much lor... the more u think the more problem u have. -jh
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