too much to take...

each time i close my eyes, the memories just keep flooding back, cant help but feel injusticed about it, i dun love her any lesser, the only factor is i din know her early enough, if someone doesnt know how to appreciate her, there are pple who do...

the worst thing is i understand how she feels, tts why i am in an even more dilemma, i'm always stuck in this controvesy of wanting her to be happy and fighting to let her go or do something about it... its killing me softly... i'm out of ideas of what to do, and how to face things... not that i dun wanna fight for it... but i know how difficult a position she is put into.. i cannot bear it... i'm lost.. and at a lost... eventually, i chose to listen to what she has to say... i cant even bear to see her upset... rather take the pain myself... keep everything to myself... pains me to talk to her, cos of the moral boundary... i wish things were much simpler, maybe i can be more selfish, but seeing her stuck in the middle pains me.. i'm hapless too... i'm living each day as it comes, nothing to look forward to... if she is happy, it suits me fine... leave the pain to me... these are things which i cant bear to tell her... i dunno what to feel anymore...

she ask me to help her and cooperate with her... is this the right way to go? i dunno...