Agony of without a comp

this is the second time that it happened... my comp crashed on me once again... this time round... just 2 days before the submission of my assignment.. and guess what? i have to redo again... freak... the last time it did this to me was last sem during the submission week for my term papers... 3 days before the submission of 2 papers... i nearly died from the stress and hectic-ness of having to redo my papers from scratch... but not surprisingly, my term papers turn out like crap.... oh wells...

i was made block head this year, lots of things to handle... but i think i am coping fine.. i know its been a long time since i updated... but there are just too many things happening around me that i haven even had time for myself.... i need to feel myself again.... at least one of the major issues was settled yesterday... relieved...

but i am troubled by matters of heart again... whats new? haha... i'm always in dilemma... even i feel disgusted by myself at times... why can't i just settle on something properly... i really dunno... i cant feel the same way anymore after kry.... maybe this time its for real, wife material.. seriously.. gotta know her better first... nothing i can do now anyway... babe... i know u are gonna flip again if u are reading this... but it may turn out to be one of my many crushes, maybe it will not... haha... sians..

i need my computer back... i got all my info inside... and i didnt back it up...
freak!!!!

no time no time...

"what's going on???"

hectic days and i am terribly ill... will update later...

in need of stability and reassurances....

*miss ya D

First day of school

today is the first day of school, my lesson doesnt start till afternoon... had the luxury of slacking ard a little bit and trying to come to terms with school life again...

i remember the exact same day last year during the first day of school, i went to the hall office to collect the Hall's annual year book and i sat alone in the room flipping through the pages and reading up and glancing through the pictures... it brought back a lot of mixed feelings... not those good and bad ones, but those of longing and missing... it happened again this year... the impact even much harder than before... cos the people whom i am closest to are now the contributors to the "Words from departing Seniors" column... At the end of this year, i too will be writing in that column, i forsee.

Cheekz mentioned that he wun be able to see me from outta his windows anymore... not roger, not weifeng nor kristian anymore as well... such a sad picture, such a sad scene painted... i looked across to A block now, what was cheekz, colin, hiep, renhan and kimmie was now replaced by bernard, bingjie, chung hang and gang... the faces whom i had grown so used to seeing each morning when i wake up, going for breakfast with... going for dinner with have changed... its even more apparent when i stepped out of my room, the usual messiness from the graduating trio are gone, we shifted rooms and new pple came in and took over... in the long wing, pple separated, some to D4, others to A4... such has become the state of B4, the level of happening people, who brought some much nonsense, joy and fun and laughter, experience and craziness to the rest of the hall... so often we were mentioned in the year book for bringing fond memories to people... thanks for having a place in your heart for us... i miss my guys...

i still remember vividly weifeng and roger's nickname on msn before me, patrick, barney and daming moved up. "things are gonna change around here..."

i look around, its certainly true... even for my A2 gang, the remmants read - yuan, xiwen and carmen, when initially there was ruoyan, wendy and charlene as well... i really wonder what will become of hall when this batch of pple graduate from school and from eusoff as well... cos this batch is at least 20-30 people... no less than last year's....

the good thing is that we are still in contact... i am grateful for that...

briefly...

pipi says it feels weird to grad..
pple from hall jus stop asking you to do anything anymore when u are in year 4... makes you think if you have be used and past your sell-by date... maybe we have all been foolish and manipulated as thou we are pawns...

i told him that maybe we can just stick together and during dnd its just gonna be us together enjoying our last days in hall... next time its just working life...

i just moved back to hall... pretty glad about it but yet sad, cos i will be leaving my lonely parents at home, esp my mum...

We lost all our titles this year in Rag and Flag, i wasnt around to witness it but it was bad enough so to speak... i heard everyone teared... sigh... sad...

school is starting tmr... sianzzz....

Good Tidings...

Finally ended my stint at Amex today, i think towards the end, Peggy wasnt too pleased with me and Dorothy, she keep sneaking on us and trying to catch us loafing and keep assigning jobs for us to do... oh well, what to do? she is our "boss" though we are not under her strength... i bet it would be so much more interesting working under Corrine doing marketing for Amex anyway... but this customer service and frontline marketing session is rewarding in the sense that it trains me up to meet the most ridiculous customers and absurd demands, alongside with quick reflexes to react to situations and being polite and maintaining a smile throughout the session... not too bad i guess... Not that i care a lot about Peggy anyway, Dot feels the same way too... that she is getting paranoid and ridiculous... mood swings she says. But i made great friends in Christina and Irene, Farhan and Liana... and later on Mohd came into the picture as he did some reliefing for Farhan who got injured playing soccer... the cashiers, some of them are quite nice too.. like claudia, brenda, charmaine... yeah, all in all its a little sad leaving the place, they keep asking us to come back to visit them... guess they miss us as much as we do miss them...

Yiming lost her wallet yesterday... its was pretty disasterous... we traced our path from bugis back to office and asked yihan and jerome to help comb the office.. it was nowhere to be found... she was sad lah... very upset but she held back her emotions and took it in her strides... i am proud of you (really!!! u hear that??) starting to have the makings of a leader already... i lent her money to take bus home, enroute to the bus-stop, i suggested to her taking cab cos its kinda late, but no cabs wanna stop. she said just go take bus la, once we reach the bus stop, her bus left... her only statement was "its not my day" tough luck girl.... Surprise for her, a kind hearted soul turn up at her place this morning and return her the wallet.. so lucky man.. haha... maybe things are starting to take a turn for the better?

Riesal's mum is discharged today, so happy for him, he was torn and weary and its been really tough for him... sigh... so glad for him, its a major relief... Kind hearted people deserve more surely...